Tuesday Narrows Its Eyes

Tuesday narrows it eyes
and looks suspiciously
at all the other days
which seem to it
to be up to something nefarious

Some believe
Tuesday was traumatised as a child
by always coming right after Monday
and now approaches life
with deliberate cynicism
though if you ask
it will deny that

Eventually
Tuesday will slide out of sight
and give way to Wednesday
but it will do so with such subtlety
that no one will realise
it was ever there at all

And Now Thursday

Thursday is happy to be Thursday
but sad not to be Friday
as Friday always seems to have all the fun

Thursday wears long denim skirts and sensible shoes
and doesn’t smoke or drink
or attend loud parties involving dancing and beer pong

Thursday would rather curl up with a book
and contemplate the possibility of cleaning its apartment
but still feels its might be missing something

Thursday pities Wednesday
who has no sense of humour and all
and sometimes turns Wednesday’s underwear inside out on laundry day

Wednesday Again

Wednesday never stops
never considers taking a break
maybe being Thursday for a while
or Tuesday
with no pants on

Frankly
Wednesday
you could stand to take your pants off
and dance around in the middle of Bloor Street
going
look everybody
I’m actually Tuesday
look at me
wearing no pants

But no
Wednesday wednesdays drearily along
picking its teeth occasionally
to get rid of the olive bits

Computer

I shall open my “bad poetry” file and quickly write a
wait
why are you
why are you doing that
I want to use the cursor
THE CURSOR
stop shrinking the file
stop
it’s at 25% and I can’t read it
I can’t type
I can’t move the cursor
STOP STOP STOP I HAVE TEN MINUTES STOP
you piece of garbage
I have to reboot now and I don’t know why
and rebooting is taking forever
reboot reboot reboot damn it
okay
you’ll let me onto the Internet but I have clicked on the file three times
THREE TIMES
THREE TIMES
and nothing is happening
nothing is happening
nothing is still happening
I am screaming at you and it is 7:30 a.m. and my neighbours probably hate me
WILL YOU OPEN YOU PIECE OF GARBAGE FOR CRYING OUT LOUD
so I go brush my teeth
and when I come back three copies of you are trying to open
still at 25%
and I am writing the poem and it is taking too long and I’m going to be late and
I hate Wednesdays so much
so so much
and now I must run out the door crying
you stupid stupid machine

Not Prepared

It would be extremely nice
if I could skip today entirely
and maybe tomorrow as well
and just go on to Thursday

Thursday
I long for you
like butter longs for mashed potatoes
like mashed potatoes
long for salt and pepper

Every day should be Thursday
and not Tuesday at all
or Wednesday either

It is possible
that my students have an assignment due today

It is just
barely possible