Pickles Are the New Cantaloupe

My kitchen is
a symbolic kitchen
full of symbolism
and you
my bride
have saved me
from the potatoes
so let us join hands
and run away
lest their fiery breath
follow us
to the ends
of the earth



Your footprints are meaningful
because of what they mean

I devoured a potato
in a metaphorical manner

There is no chimney
on the rooftop of life

Small is the opposite
of happy

When you lose the contest
try to win the war


My potato
is going to be king
with the sceptre and the crown and everything
because it answered the riddles
and completed the impossible tasks
and won the princess
which is actually pretty good
for a potato

Your potato
is terrible
while mine has accomplished all the things
and thus your potato
should slink away home in shame

All hail the potato
king of potatoes
wielder of the rule of law
singer of the song

It is hard for the princess
as every time she glances
at her potato husband
her stomach
begins to growl