I learned to fly
the day you ate my hat

The facts are unconnected
except through poetry

Poetry is magic
and I want my hat back

Give me my hat back
you cad


Into the Hat

We went together
into the hat
and it was all sawdust
in the circle of terror
it was all birds
and the unreliable witness screamed
and a shot rang out
and all the clichés
sulked their way into the hologram
and the class was dismissed
and then I woke up


There is dust in the watering hole
and nothing will ever be the same again
except the tips of the squirrels
and their gleeful little hats
and somebody’s leftover rainbow

Grieve for the pudding
which is not like other puddings
and cheer for the pudding
which is not like other puddings

Follow the rattlesnake
Jenny Cooper
and lash it
to the tongue
of its enemy

Rain Threat

Surely it’s going to rain
because the report says it is
and we all
look anxiously
at the sky

But it isn’t raining
oh my God A CLOUD
still not raining
though the wind just blew my hat off

I thought the weather people
had projected a thunderstorm
so where’s all the rain at?
It’s hard to be this anxious
for several hours in a row

It didn’t rain
and I’m relieved
and also disappointed
at the same time


O Canada
You sit atop the United States
Like a large floppy hat
a hat
made of moose and misconceptions
about eternal snow
and maple syrup
and universal travel by dog sled

Your birthday is
three days before the birthday
of the head on which you sit
and that head is very loud and boisterous
and does not even notice
the hat it is wearing

But that’s okay
because you have Nanaimo bars
and you put cheese curds and gravy
on your fries