Face Punchy

You are very
face punchy today
with your suit
and your briefcase
and your vanilla chai latte
and the condescending way
you talk to the barista
as you text somebody
to prove to us all
how busy and important you are
My fist longs
to punch your face
which is calling to it
begging for the sweetness of that punch
and the thunderous applause
that would follow it
Alas
you are leaving
and I am left
with my dreams
of punching your face
not with the reality
of having done so

Introvert

Please get your face
away from my face

There have been faces everywhere
all day
and they have sucked out all my energy
and replaced it with pumpkin innards
and molasses

I need to huddle on my couch
and cry for five days
and I need
to do it now

How nice that you’re going
to a party later
but if I don’t read this book now
my life will be empty
and meaningless
and way too full of faces

Stop Your Face

Stop your face
from getting in the way
of my face

Only my face
is allowed around here
and everybody knows that
except you

Someday you will obtain
a face that can
usurp other faces

But right now
your face is annoying
and does not have
the proper clearance

Tenants

Very little in this world
is so profound
as a box full of tenants
angry that the broken elevator
has chosen not to go to the
fourteenth, sixteenth, or seventeenth
floors

Punch destiny in the face, tenants!
Rage against the dysfunctionality
of a device meant to make life easier
and its completely broken twin next door

The landlady’s cavalier declaration
that the elevator is working fine
is probably going to get her yelled at
one of these days

Wow

When a tooth extraction
goes horribly wrong
and you spend a week downing
so many pain meds
that you’re pretty sure you’ve given yourself an ulcer
and you have to sing in the evening
and it’s 34̊C plus humidity
and your face feels like half of it is melting into a puddle of pain
and the postal lady won’t let you mail your packages
because she says they’re too heavy and they’ll cost you too much and
one of them is going to Japan
for crying out loud
and you have twenty-three customs forms to fill in
plus eighteen more later on
but you can’t concentrate on that because of the appalling pain
and your dentist can’t see you for another forty minutes
generally you just write a terrible poem
and hope for the best.

Tooth of Wisdom

Goodbye
wisdom tooth
it was sad to see you go
even though you apparently
had a huge cavity
that was eventually going to start hurting
a lot

Now there is only
a gaping hole
that occasionally gushes blood
possibly because I think the stitches fell out like half an hour after the extraction
a gaping hole
that signifies
my heart

My dentist asked me
if I wanted to keep you afterwards
because I guess he once had a patient who got really upset
when the assistant threatened
to throw his tooth away

But I didn’t even bid you farewell

I just went home
and grimaced a lot
since my face was so frozen
that for a long time
I couldn’t even feel my right ear

Sleep Deficit

Come sleep
O sleep
you bastard
and stop deserting me
after the first five hours

I would like to punch you in the face
O sleep
if you had a face
and even if you didn’t,
I would like to punch you
in the face you didn’t have

Lack of sleep
is like raspberries
only less tasty
and I can’t really say how else it’s like raspberries
because I’m so goddamn tired

The unicorn of sleep
has left me forever
and I am left only with the tears of poltergeists
which seems perfectly logical to me
because of the fatigue fairies