Your Excuses Are Diamond

diamond excuses
full of stardust
OH LET ME TOUCH THEE
WITH MY MIND
my wonderful
sapphire mind
wrap me
in sulfur
wrap me
in chains
wrap me
in sandwich meat
and BLOW
the CAT
away

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Your Cat Is in the Fireplace, Ethel

Perhaps you should consider
doing something about Muffin
and her apparent inability
not to cover herself from head to toe in soot
then step delicately out onto the cream-coloured carpet
wash one ear
freak out for no reason
and run up the curtains
where she will stay forever
since when you try to remove her
she will attempt to behead you

You are not a cat person
are you

Definitely Not a Cat

Damn damn damn
I have tripped over my own assumptions
and am about to learn a neat little lesson
as I sit with a symbolic animal
in my lab

While that happens
stand by
and afterwards
one of us can become the villain

I bet that
sounds good
to you