I Unfairly Blame Everything on My Reading Glasses, Lo

I misread the instructions
because I forgot my reading glasses

I skipped two lines of dialogue
because I forgot my reading glasses

I missed the appointment
because I forgot my reading glasses

I conquered the wrong country
because I forgot my reading glasses

I caused the annihilation of all life on earth
because I forgot my reading glasses

I am the scourge of humanity
because I forgot my reading glasses

I can’t tell the difference between those two cans of beans
because I forgot my reading glasses

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