Ode to a USB Keyboard

O USB keyboard
I quite like you
as you are not malfunctioning
and do not yet have breadcrumbs
stuck under your keys
meaning that every time I want to type the letter “s”
I have to jam my finger down so hard
that I end up injuring myself
and then we get the swearing
and the vague threats of physical damage
and it’s all
just a little bit sordid

I’m sure you will eventually
work as badly as everything else electronic I own
but for now
little USB keyboard
alleviator of terrible frustration


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